Help Wanted

An estimated 20 million of our nation’s young people can currently be diagnosed with a mental health disorder. That comes to about one in every five kids ages 3-17 having a mental, emotional, behavioral or developmental disorder, according to the Department of Health and Human Services. If that wasn’t sobering enough, many more are at risk of developing a disorder due to factors in their genetics, or within their schools, families, communities, and among their peers.

It goes without saying that there is a great need for mental health professionals to provide the best available care based on scientific evidence, good clinical expertise, and the unique characteristics of the child. However, current estimates are that only about 20 percent of children who need these services receive the appropriate help from a qualified mental health professional.

“Is this a problem? Is this normal? Did I wait too long? Does my child need medication or will psychotherapy be enough? How do I tell you about my child without them feeling betrayed by me?” These are just some of the questions many parents ask themselves prior to seeking professional help, says board certified Clinical Psychologist Dr. Justin D’Arienzo. “It’s often a challenge to both recognize your child needs help and to accept it. Many parents delay getting help often because of magical thinking, even when it comes to their kids. We think things will magically get better. Sometimes they do get better, but not with magic. Also, it’s painful to think your kid needs help, so sometimes we avoid getting help for that reason, too.”

Of course, mental health—an essential part of children’s overall wellbeing—involves a complex interactive relationship with their physical health and their ability to succeed in school, in society and later in life. Both physical and mental health affect how we think, feel, and act on the inside and outside. We’ve all heard the stories—such as an overweight young boy who is teased about his body who may withdraw socially and become depressed and may be reluctant to play with others, further contributing to his poor physical health and, as a result, poorer mental health. 

Among the more common mental health conditions that can be diagnosed in childhood are anxiety disorders (often severe fears or worries), depressive disorders, and behavioral disorders. Initial diagnosis of these and other conditions are often made during one’s school years but sometimes can be earlier, depending on the condition. However, some kids with a mental health condition may not be recognized or diagnosed as having one. Also, symptoms of mental health conditions change over time as a child grows and may include difficulties with how the child feels, his ability to handle emotions, and how he learns, plays, and acts around others. It’s not uncommon for some conditions to start in early childhood, while others do not begin to develop until later or during their teenage years.

“If your child is in distress and you can’t get them relief or they are self-destructing and they won’t stop, I would always take that situation seriously and then seek professional help,” says D’Arienzo. “More subtle signs that something may be amiss include a sudden shift in behavior or mood that lasts for more than a couple days, moping around the house, avoiding their friends and family, isolating or locking themselves in their room, choosing new friends that have a bad reputation, not sleeping or eating, talking about death, or avoiding school and social events.

In early puberty, regions of the brain linked to emotions and social behaviors are developing more quickly than regions associated with cognitive control of behavior. These developmental changes can drive young people to seek attention and approval from their peers. For some, using social media fulfills that need in a healthy way, providing opportunities for connection and validation to youth who may be isolated from peers, geographically or otherwise. For others, negative messages, such as online bullying and unrealistic standards around physical appearance, appear to have a detrimental effect, though more research is needed to understand who is most at risk. 

The Covid-19 pandemic ushered in a new set of challenges for youth in the country, leading to a mental health crisis declared by the U.S. Surgeon General. But the pandemic wasn’t the start of the crisis. According to the American Psychological Association, many of the country’s kids and teens have been suffering for far longer. In the ten years leading up to the pandemic, feelings of persistent sadness and hopelessness, as well as suicidal thoughts and behaviors, increased by about 40 percent among young people. In addition to the social isolation and academic disruption nearly all teens and children faced, many also lost family and friends to the virus, had a parent lose a job, over were victims of physical or emotional abuse at home.

All these difficulties, on top of the growing concerns about social media, mass violence, natural disasters, climate change, and political polarization—not to mention the normal ups and downs of childhood and adolescence—can feel insurmountable to a developing mind. And social issues and disruptions like these didn’t affect all young people equally. Echoing pre-Covid-19 trends, the CDC found that girls, LGBTQ youth, and those who have experienced racism were more likely to have more mental health during the pandemic.

According to D’Arienzo, “It’s never a mistake to seek help. If it’s not needed, the psychologist will tell you, and at least you’ve opened the pathway for your child to get help if ever needed and you’ve established a relationship with a mental health provider in town that now knows your family and can help you in the future.”

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